Guitar

It is 3:45 in the AM!

I come out to switch the laundry...why am I doing laundry in the middle of the night? I can't sleep!....back to the story. I come out of my room, and the lovely and magnificent Paige is awake. I said "What are you doing?" She said "Listen to the song I just learned to play"

So we sat down in the front room and I heard my daughter play a song on her guitar-Heart of Worship, and there is a line in there that says "you search much deeper within, through the way things appear..you're looking in my heart" I came back into the room and thought what a blessing I have for a daughter. She loves the Lord. She is funny, sweet, kind. I look at her and see her heart. She is exactly the way she was created to be. I am overwhelmed with joy..not because I did something right..but because she is fearfully and wonderfully made.

California

Even though my pictures are gone, I did manage to get some from my parents, and I remembered I sent a picture I took of my kids on vacation to a friend. I was able to go through my sent messages and found it. This is the first day of vacation. We had a blast in the pool. The kids were pretending to be from HSM..it was quite comical.

Pictures

There are those moments you wish didn't happen.

The ones that make your heart hurt.

I had one of those this weekend. My laptop with all my pictures of the kids for the last 8 months is ruined. I feel like something was stolen from me...my kids experiencing life. We had so many fun things that have happened in the last 8 months. Birthdays, holidays, Paige's first band gig, two huge vacations to South Dakota and California.. and our everyday life..so many "firsts lost". I have looked at those pictures hundreds of times over the past months. Organizing them, planning scrap pages, picking ones to frame.. they are gone. I still see my kids in the pictures in my head, and I feel heartbroken. I know I will have thousands of other opportunities to take more pictures, but right now..

It is not enough.