RRP2 (We have the same eyes)

I love this picture of Kain and me. He makes me smile with his wackiness. He makes faces nearly every time we take pictures. I think what I love the most about this picture is that our eyes match! He is the only one who has true blue eyes like me.

Sometimes I feel like I am at the end of my rope..he knows how to push..how to poke...how to irritate, and I want to throw my hands in the air and scream (I do sometimes) but I get Kain. I love him more than he even understands. We have a thing, Kain and I. I love you to the moon and back. He hates my kisses, doesn't like to snuggle me anymore, rolls his eyes when I dance in the car, but he knows...I know..we both love each other to the moon and back.

RRP1 (We are not farm people)

We are not farm people..We do not have a barn, a huge pasture, horses, ducks, a pond..All the things Dana has that Mia LOVES!! We are blessed to have Dana who is a huge part of our lives..She isn't an aunt by blood, or by marriage, but she is an aunt in EVERY way.

She comes to the kids events, sets up playdates, listens to all the stories of our lives..everyday..and really cares. She knows what all four of my kids are doing on any given day and loves them and supports them.

I appreciate it, love her and don't take a second of it for granted.

This day, because Mia begged..in the rain..Dana took her on a little horseback ride. As you can tell by the picture, Mia was thrilled. She loved it! She had some hand me down pink boots she bought from Dani and Kenna's yard sale and her bandana and she was ready to go. Life is so good, and it is moments like this that I know she will remember forever..and know how loved she is.

So..

So Ginger just texted me and asked why she couldn't post on my FB, my answer..I have no idea :) But the conversation went something like this after that..

Me: I am supposed to be working on homemade Christmas gifts and I am blogging and facebooking instead.
Ginger : Now you are texting too. I am supposed to be sleeping because I have to get up early to work on evaluations
Me: It's called ADD. I can't help but do many things. Evals = barf.
Ginger:It can be a gift and a curse - ADD
Me:It gives me all my creativity and causes me to finish nothing at the same time
Ginger:Pefectly put! I hope you finish up soon
Me: and if I had to do an evaluation, it would say "I went in to observe your class, and I got sidetracked by your sparkly necklace, therefore, you are awesome"
Me: (this one in my head) Did she really fall asleep, just like that? I wonder if she has worn that cute scarf she got at Kohls the other day..I still owe her for Costco..What time did she say the kids next games were...Did she get my email..about the Mary Kay..Did she see the holiday Minute to Win it..I need to get on that if we are doing it as a family for Christmas..also....

Russian Roulette Blogging

Ok, So...I am so far behind that I am lapping myself. I know I will never, ever, NEVER, get to all the pictures I take, and they certainly won't be in any sort of chronological order..it just isn't me..not in the cards..

So, here is what I have decided to do..play picture roulette...I am going to just open a random, and most certainly unlabeled folder of pictures..pick one and talk about it. I think this makes TOTAL sense!!!

I am not going to write out Russian Roulette Blogging every single time so I have decided on RRP1, RRP2, and so on..This is going to be fun..I can just feel it.

While we are on the subject of fun. In the category of fun, is my use of the "......." This is so not grammatically correct, but they make me happy. It is how I can write, and not edit..and change subjects..and not complete sentences! MAN, that makes me happy!

While I am on an ADD tangent, I will add that the following random things make me happy (these are mindless things, and me not listing my kids, my family, my friends, and all that jazz is a given - they are above the mindless list)

1. Crazy Core Skittles. I love them and could eat a giant bag and not think twice about it.

2. All things pink. I had to add that one because I am sitting in my awesome black, white and pink scrapbook room:)

3. Infinity Scarfs..Can't get enough of them and wear one with casual clothes and it totally dresses it up.

4. Hair flowers, but not gerb flowers( I like these, not love) handmade..different ones. They are a life saver while growing out my hair for Locks for Love.

5.Diet Coke...love.

6. Game shows. I have a 75 year old soul apparently

7. The quiet that happens in the middle of the night.

8. Crafting blogs..that only add to my ADD.

There are more, but my tangent has kept me from my new RRP plan..and so I am done!

Christmas Presents and the milk to cereal ratio

What does this picture of cereal have to do with my Christmas Presents? Well, you are about to find out..

Today, I started to sort my Christmas gifts..Four kids..four small piles..trying to make it even for in amount..even in size..even in price...it just doesn't work.

So far, at this moment, things are a bit lop-sided. I got out my piece of paper and wrote down what each child had from each person (since I did extra shopping for grandparents) and what I discovered...is that I need to do more shopping..oh so sad for me..

I was telling my friend Vanna about my predicament after school today and she said it best..I say Christmas shopping is like milk and cereal..You get a bowl of cereal and eat it. At the end, you realize you have a bit of milk left..so you add more cereal. Then, you need more milk because your cereal needs a bit more. Over and over.

The same applies to shopping for gifts. You get one more gift to balance here, and then one more gift to balance here. In the end, you have more gifts than you intended to buy and want to pull your hair out when you look at the checking account balance.

Vanna texted me later and asked what I was doing, I said "trying to figure out my milk to cereal ratio"

So I lost my laptop

I lost my laptop...It is mini, but it isn't that small..what the heck. I had to get out the big laptop, which is great, but NONE of my pictures are on this one!!! Blogging is never easy for me..I don't like technology. Technology doesn't like me...Well I like it, but I would like someone else to assist me!

Another season almost over for Carter! I can't believe it. He is amazing. Truly

I have to take pictures this next weekend...if my camera returns from Panasonic (see my love/hate issues). Thankfully, I have found some great picture of carter on wyopix that I can have copies made...makes it easier to get good pictures that I may or may not scrapbook...

I have so many thoughts running through my head all the time, I don't know why I can't seem to get them down here.

Paige found out she made All-Northwest..it was harder to get into this year and she made it. She also just found out she made All-state. She is at state drama right now, I can't wait to see the pictures. The community play is this week. Wow.

Mia..is starting a book club. This makes me so happy since I have been in the same one for over ten years!!

Kain, finally stood up to the bully, punched him in the face and it is better..for now anyway!!

Me, I have been working at ton at Southside and LOVIN' it. I love the staff,the kids, the whole deal..it makes me happy!! :)

I have done NO decorating, no wrapping, haven't completed my shopping..so that is nice!!

I did have a very successful craft fair..the is actually NICE :)

December is here and I know this month is actually going to scream by..I need to get organized..

Procrastinators unite..tomorrow.

Free Time..

It's not like Carter has much free time. Football turned into basketball with a Sunday break in between. But this last weekend, there were no games! It is rare, and the kids always enjoy a bit of sleeping in and hanging out. After church yesterday, Carter and Kalei were shooting hoops when they saw the sidewalk chalk and decided to do a little artwork. It was impossible to get the right angle to read it..Carter wanted to climb on the roof and stand on a ladder for the proper aerial veiw. Kalei said.."ok, I am going to sit on a pillow on the rim and you can raise up the hoop"..I opted for neither of these and just stood on a ladder (short one) and took these pictures. I love that in a video game/technology world, the boys like the simple things. Kain and Mia were out there helping them too..Our fall is almost over and its fun to see the kids enjoy these last few days! We did enjoy our no game weekend..this next week, we start the games again! :) Go Carter!

It says Carter + Kalei = Love...NERDS!!!

Could She REALLY be 16?

The answer...yes!

I have mixed emotions about this. She is amazing, kind, funny, witty, and truly a joy to be around. But 16...SIXTEEN

I love that she still acts silly. That just last night she was trying to convince Carter to dance ballet with her and she would run and dive into his arms..and he, being the good brother would catch her.

I love that she cares. I love that she doesn't act like a teenager. I love that church isn't just something she has to do. I love the way she loves her siblings (for the most part). I love that she sees when I need help. I love the way she makes me laugh by telling me stories about her day. I love that her teachers love her. I love that she loves music. I love that she still thinks I am pretty cool. I love that she is loyal. I love that she sings like no one is listening. I love that music moves her. I love that she wears dresses. I love that she is one of a kind in a world of cookie cutters. I love that well, she is Paige..because I could go on forever.

I hate that she is growing up. I hate that time feels like it is slipping through my hands. I hate that she talks about college. I hate that her time left with me is short..it breaks my heart.

I have this time left..I will cherish every single stinkin minute. :)

big sigh

Somedays are easier than others. Somedays all the kids get along great, have a wonderful attitude..and then there are the other days. The morning where everyone gets up late.
Paige needs her hair braided, and did I mention I made 8 homecoming olympic tshirts and capes, and 2 more shirts for her, and a hairbow in the last 2 days? Mia needs hers braided and she can't find her shoes. Kain didn't do his homework, and I forgot to wash his clothes, and we had a huge blowout and I sent him to school with tears in his eyes, and Carter won't eat breakfast....that was this morning. Big sigh.

I knew everyday wasn't going to be a cake walk, but sometimes, it gets totally overwhelming. I love them all so much and woud walk through fire for them. At times, in certain circumstances, I feel like I have. It's all part of the job description..right? I wouldn't trade one of them for the world, but it's hard sometimes. Big sigh. Maybe a massage will work? Pedicure? Nap? Book? It's time to chose one of them :)

Brothers

When brothers agree, no fortress is so strong as their common life

Brothers..the joy, the laughter, the pain.

---Growing up with no brothers, I guess I didn't understand brothers until I started dating Josh. His relationship with his brothers was a strong one. Yes, they would fight and argue about crazy things..pick on each other, and point out every quirky thing the other ones would do...but they were also fiercely devoted to each other. They would stand up for each other and shared everything...talk about cars, music, family, girls...you get the drift.

---I wondered, as I held Carter for the first time..what would he do? What will be become? When Kain arrived, I wondered the same things. I still wonder. I look at these two amazing boys with the world at their feet and know the possibilities are endless...but what I love the most is the relationship they have..the good and the bad.

---Tonight the boys were throwing the football to each other for a long time. I walked out in the front yard and smiled. Brothers are built in friends. It's someone to talk about school, sports, share you-tube videos with, play video games with, someone to play ENDLESS games of chess with. (this list could go on forever)

---On the other hand, someone who knows EXACTLY what to say to get under your skin, who knows the words that hurt the most, who bugs you, throws things at you, screams at you..you get the idea.

---I wonder if they know how lucky they are, and I already know the answer. Not yet. Someday they will. I pray that my kids will always be close, that no matter the miles or the circumstances they will be able to be there for each other. I have told the kids a thousand times. "friends come and go, but family is what makes it all worth it"

Fall Crafting :)

I have no idea what it is about the weather change that makes me want to craft. Fall is in the air, and I am seriously juggling about 10ish projects. I am making cards, working on birthday gifts, getting ready to sew some skirts for Mia, planning Christmas gifts..I call it craft ADD.

I get started on one project (today I made birthday countdown blocks) and then move onto the next..sometimes without finishing the one I was working on. I have made more than 50 cards in the last week, and am still working on more. With every project I make I think of about 5 more I could do next. I think I could spend every minute of everyday crafting and never run out of ideas.

Why am I writing about this? Because it is craziness! Craziness that totally makes me happy. I will post pictures of completed projects ASAP..well the ones I can without giving away birthday/Christmas gifts :)

Summer Mentality

Mia, my sweet sweet kind girl..starting 2nd grade with Mrs. Emery. It feels like 5 minutes ago she was just a baby. Now she is into Barbies, Build-A-Bears,playing with her good friend Madison, Girl Scouts and hopefully a dance class.

I am not a mom who counts down until the kids go to school. I am the mom who wants to keep them home forever. We did have a wonderful summer together and I was not ready for it to end. I call it the "summer mentality" and I would like to have it all year long.

Kain..a 4th grader. He has Mrs. Masterson..I had Masterson, Paige had Masterson, Carter had Masterson and we were thrilled Kain gets to as well. Kain my little whiz kid who makes everything seem easy. Kain loves to make us laugh, sports, board games, video games, and friends. He is excited to play another year of flag football and basketball.

What is the "summer mentality" you ask? Well, it is life without schedule. There are not hours spent daily in the car. It is sleeping in until you want to get up. It is chillin in PJ's until you feel like changing.

Carter, 8th grader..king of the hill at the middle school. I can't believe it. He has grown inches this summer and is taller than me. He loves sports as much as he always has. He is a leader, a kind person, has integrity, and humor. I am proud of him every day.

"Summer Mentality" is having mattresses in the front room from the end of May until the weekend before school starts. These are to sleep on, jump on, pile up and play on.

Paige, my Sophomore at PHS. She is kind, funny, incredibly talented in all things art. I am grateful for her help, her friendship, and just who she is..

"Summer Mentality" is family time. Playing chess, ping pong, pool, and basketball. It is simple. Easy. Free.

These four kids...are my most valuable gifts. I know they are more than just another name, another student, another number, another test score..They are more. This is the hardest part of sending them out the door. I am thankful for when they walk back into the house and tell me everything that happened and as Carter said today..well 3 weeks down...and counting. We all love the "summer mentality"

Surgery

I have decided to have a better attitude this time and accept the limitations. I have decided to listen to the doctor this time. I have decided surgery still is as bad as I remember :)

Tuesday I did it, I bit the bullet and had my second foot surgery. Dr. Biles said it was about time and a good thing I did. The joint was gone, there were massive amounts of scar tissue, it was a mess. Metal plate and 5 screws later..I am on the mend. It has been a tough few days (but we all know the first days are the hardest) I am already sick of the morphine haze, but thankfully today I was able to be just a little mobile. 4 weeks with zero weight is such a long time, but today I felt a glimmer of hope. Dana went and got me a knee scooter from Biles office. It lifted my spirits by 50 percent! You put your knee of the bad leg on it and use your good leg and scoot around. I actually was so happy when my mom and dad were over I was sailing through the house! My dad told me I am like Barbara Jean on Reba (she is kooky and crazy, and I love that show..I took as a compliment)

I started working on a fun project tonite. I set up a card table beside my bed..moved in Jamie's big cricut, paper, glue, buttons etc..it made me totally happy! So..when there are those moments when I am feeling like doing a little something, I can still keep my foot elevated above my head and get it done! It's a reminder that it is the little things that make me happy!

I am blessed by my friends and family who have made sure that I am taken care of, who come and lay on the bed and talk to me, who bring us goodies, flowers, and everything else I could need. It's going to be a long haul, but heck..I am already 4 days down. :)

From Paige's blog

This was Paige's blog entry today...she is a girl who has it figured out.

"These are the days of our lives"

I hear this all the time, then I stop and think..are these really the days of our lives?
The fighting with our “best friends.”
The constant need and want to “fit in.”
The worrying and anxiety that comes from not sticking to the “normal.”
The crying over a “love” that lasted for a week?
The battle you have with yourself because you aren’t “good enough.”
Or are the days of our lives this?
Being your true self with the people around you.
Experiencing unconditional love from your family.
Being successful and enjoying what you do.
Not focusing on the negative.
Being able to look at yourself and like it.
Bottom Line:
High School is not and never will be “the days of our lives.”
There is so much more that lies beyond those doors. :)

I opened my phone and saw this text and it brought tears to my eyes

"I love you forever, I like for always...as long as I'm living my mommy hero best friend you'll be"

but wait.

My mind never stops. They say "a woman is like a river, the past, present, and future all flow together"..this does not help my thought process.

I laid in bed this morning thinking.....

1. I need to scrapbook..wait, I need to get the pictures organized and off the 3 different camera cards I have.

2. I want a coffee..wait, I am not supposed to be drinking coffee.

3. I need to workout..wait, I don't want to work out

4. I miss Paige..wait, this will be a good thing for her...but wait..why didn't her choir director in Powell ever return any of her calls or texts?

5. Mia has been back to sleeping with me since Paige left...wait, didn't I say the other day they grow so fast?

6. Kain finally got a hair cut...wait, I should have documented that.

7. It's official, Carter is taller than my dad...wait, this would explain his midnight feedings (no lie, he can't sleep because he is so hungry)

8. I have so many things to do this week to get ready for our vacation to Idaho..but wait, I am pretty tired. I will lay here longer

9. I want to blog more, but I never have pictures to go with what I am talking about because I am too unorganized..wait, that isn't going to change.

10. I am still blessed...and my mind didn't say "but wait"

Well then

I wonder why I can't seem to get on here and write anything down..I have so many things to say..but three months go by? Crazy.

Kain just celebrated his 10th birthday and had a wonderful party with his friends. The kids and I built a fire pit. It was a huge sucIess at the party with smores and hotdogs being the menu :) We have had a trip to New York, basketball camps, football camps, basketball tournaments and baseball..girl scout activities, trips to yellowtail, playdates, sleepovers, and so much more. Summer it is an amazing thing..freedom, fun, laughter..I know the kids can't believe it is half over..I can't either. I am not ready. I don't want them to go back to school, when I see school supplies..my heart hurts.

My new decision..to live in the moment..to really enjoy each precious moment. You blink and a week, a month (or three until I blog again..ha) and years pass by. I always thought that my parents were nuts I would hear them say "where did the time go" "it goes so fast, just yesterday you were in my arms". I now understand..because just yesterday my kids were babies. Now I have one who is considering school in another state..a teenage boy who is taller than me..a 10 year old who makes me laugh every single day..and a sweet 7 year old who is about to be eight.

I spend way too many hours dwelling on the past, or worrying about things in the future..when the truth is..I have to take the time to enjoy the NOW..the moments, I can't get back. There are so many that I have to be thankful for. The kids and I went mini golfing on Kain's birthday..it sprinkled on us, we laughed..we danced...we sang..we took pictures..I am blessed daily by my children. My precious gifts from the Lord, that he has given me the responsibility of raising into adults. They are funny, kind, talented, amazing and loved beyond measure by me. :) What else really matters?

a month....

Has it really been a month since I have posted. It isn't like nothing has happened and I had nothing to say or pictures to post...it is that we have had so much going on and I just haven't been making the time.

Carter, at the moment is in Florida with my parents for his 13th vacation. He has had a blast. A magic game, blue man group, disney quest, typhoon lagoon, ripley's, holy land, wind tunnel skydiving, flying a plane...it has been an adventure. I can't wait for him to get home and see all the pictures I had threatened my parents to take. I just LOVE that they get to experience these things. My dad (KING OF FUN) and mom make sure that these trips are just what each grand kid chooses. They makes sure they do things that appeal to them. It is wonderful. I have missed Carter and can't wait to see him. Easter felt so different with one of my children missing.

I need to get back into a routine of posting here, so I will make it my goal to get organized and on it. I look back on pictures and see all that has happened and the only thing I can say is WOW...our life is crazy. Our mechanic, Tracy Sweet, is in shock every time he has to change the oil every 4000 miles..which is about 1 1/2 months..I am not kidding. It is INSANE. I am thankful for my kids, and the ability I have to run them to all the fun activities they get to do. Josh is a trooper and supportive of all the kids and their interests and activities. He gets to do plenty of running himself.

Life is crazy, insane,stressful (at times), busy - but there is lots of laughter, smiles and fun along the way.

Normal

I am actually in the middle of blogging some pictures of Carter from football this year. Yes, that is how far behind I am. I have heard it said that women are like a river..the past, present, and future all flow together..so my reasoning is..am I really behind?

ANYWAY, as I was working on it I started to think about a few things. I have said several times this last week. "I am trying to get back to my normal" What does that even mean? I have NO idea. I can tell you that with all the chaos of the school situation, things have just been OUT OF CONTROL! I am ready to have "normal" days, "normal" conversations, a "normal" handle on my emotions.

Paige is finally doing better. It has been a long road and there are many obstacles still, but for the first time in a long time,I have some peace. I know we will look back on this situation and probably never laugh, but celebrate that we all survived. We are blessed with a wonderful family, great friends, a wonderful church family, teachers - I don't want to forget that.

So back to the NORMAL...

normal
Definition
nor·mal

1. usual: conforming to the usual standard, type, or custom (this is what I totally need to get back to. Normal days filled with normal activities. I think I will enjoy cleaning..haha. But, I would like to feel like I am prepared for a day and know what the heck is going on around me)

2. healthy: physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy (this is what the WHOLE family needs right now. It is insane how it not only changed Paige, it changed ALL of us. The stress level rose by 100 percent and we all felt the toll and STILL are on many levels)

3. occurring naturally: maintained or occurring in a natural state (maintaining normalcy..count me in)

Music

I think every song was written for me.

I can't tell you the number of times my kids have heard "oh this is my new favorite song" We have music we use to clean to..usually has some Kesha, some Usher, some Jay Sean, some Stars..you get the idea :)

Then there is music that I call my mantra songs. I usually have a different one each day. To become the mantra, they must be listened to 72 times in a day. It is the message I use for the day to motivate me, encourage me, or my what I am feeling at that time. I say it changes daily, but there are songs that stay for weeks sometimes..The song right now is Your Hands by JJ Heller.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YiULD_Ng8o

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crookedly lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

When You walked upon the Earth
You healed the broken, lost, and hurt
I know You hate to see me cry
One day You will set all things right

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

my little actors :)

Missoula was so much fun. I love seeing my girls on stage. They have so much talent. Seeing Mia come out on stage and dance did nothing but put a smile on every persons face. There were a lot of dust bunnies, but Mia was one of two that had a speaking part and individual lines. The director told me in all his years of this, he has never had one of his "peewees" forget their part and say "LINE". He said he and the other director looked and each other with awe.

Paige..is well Paige. Amazing. I was told by a few people "what a presence she has on stage" and "what a voice she has" and she does. I saw more laughter, more joy, and more peace from her when she was at practice and performing that I have in a long time. It was fun.

Tonight, as I reflect on the day, many things cross my mind. I keep typing and deleting. I am famous for it. I do it on Facebook. I do it when I text. I do it in emails.

Does this mean I am censoring myself to make it appear like I have only nice things to say? maybe.

Does this mean that I would like to think everything is peachy and don't want to say otherwise? maybe.

Does this mean that I have ADD and 8 million thoughts are racing all at once and I can't process them all through - and couldn't even begin to write them all down because I would have to stop the process? FOR SURE.

Here are the thoughts of the moment.

-Why had my dog been whining all day? I have heard her whine more today than I have ever heard her whine in her 3 yrs of life.

-Why is my house never all the way clean? Where do all the things come from? I am a packrat..well, a Hunter and Gatherer sounds better.

-I wonder how Carter will do at his tournament this weekend, and why did he chose Venezuela for his social studies project. I am sick of Venezuela.

-If Mia really does sleep in her room for two weeks in a row, I will have to get her a guinea pig and I really don't want to.

-Why does Kain go through shoes at twice the rate Carter does? Why does he think it is funny to use poop in sentences?

-I am itchy

-What if I took Skippy Jon Jones to the vet (which I need to because we haven't since we adopted him) and found out he was a SHE?

-Paige. She is on my mind all the time lately. Does this mean I haven't been making time for anything else? Are my other kids suffering? Are we going to come out of this on the other side? When will that be? What can I do to help? How can I fix this?

My overall answer to most of my questions. I don't know, and No you can't fix it.

So where does this leave me? Doing what I am doing right now. Typing and Deleting. Questioning and Wondering.

I hear Mia's footsteps. Guinea Pig question postponed a little longer. :)

I am blogging to..

1. not clean my house
2. not make supper
3. get my mind on something else.

Here is what I would like. One day. One day with no school truama. One day with no new issues. One day with no dirty looks, comments, issues from this same group of girls. One day where Paige would see how stupid they are. One day where Paige would look at herself and see she is the one who is okay and will come out on the other end okay. I am tired. Tired of the fight. Tired of the drama. Plain old tired.

Ok. Got that off my chest. Whew. What a weekend. Missoula was awesome. The kids had a good weekend - fun with friends. I didn't do much, except we did do some cleaning yesterday. It was long overdue, and I have so much more to do.

We went and looked at a house last night in Byron. Byron..I know, but we thought it may just be the answer to some prayers. We got more info tonight - Not enough square footage and not the right price. We will keep looking, or be content here (which I am) This house has a lot of work to be done, but it feels like home. So much of our childhood and now our kids are wrapped up into this house. It feels right to me.

If I would somehow become an organzied person it would be the answer to all my problems..hahaha. If only.

Friday

Today was a day off from school. Hooray. Kain went snowboarding with Dylon. He had a blast. They rode the magic carpet up and boarded down over and over. Carter went to Heny's then to the games. The girls had play practice (tomorrow is the big day) After Mia's practice, we worked on some Valentines for the grandparents..we need to finish those tomorrow :) We then got Paige, and got ready for JV basketball. We met Cindi there and watched a game. Left the boys there,and the girls came home. Rough for Paige, but we got through it.

Dana, Franko and I went to the movie Valentines day. I loved it. It made me think about Valentines day. I realized I have worked on so many other projects, that I don't have everything ready for my kids. I guess that is what tomorrow is for. :) After haircuts and 2 performances, of course. Part of the movie took place in a flower shop,and it reminded me of fun times in Dana's flower shop. When you walked in the back door, you would be overwhelmed with the smell of flowers. There would be containers of them everywhere. It was delightful. There was always the bustle of hundreds of orders and of course the "last minute men" begging for arrangements. We always told stories about what we thought they were doing, where they were going, and who they were for. It was a happy time, although you left there never wanting to smell a flower again.

I look at flowers now and honestly think "waste of money" but then, I was captivated by flowers. Now I think more practical. It is funny how time changes you.

things I want to say..but won't

There are many things I wish I would have said today. You know..those conversations you replay over and over in your head. I am tired. Tired of fighting the school for basic needs of my child. Today I was treated poorly -spoken to with condescending words. As I think about it tonight. I hope I never make others feel that way. I know most times to get what you want you have to get ugly..it just isn't my nature. (which is why I ate $200 on a bad color for Paige) I just sit and stew about what I would do if I could..instead of getting red faced and shaking, I would say the things I have thought of tonight..or would I? The truth of the matter is...it just isn't me.

Missoula Childrens Theater

Another Year, another nervous Monday. Paige, who has been in the Missoula Childrens Theater since Kindergarten (except in 3rd grade when Paige didn't make it)and Mia, auditioned (for her second year) yesterday. Paige is so talented in this department. She makes it look easy to sing and perform in front of a large group. She may be nervous on the inside, but it never shows outwardly. Of course, she got one of the bigger parts again this year. She is the Snow Queen. Mia was more nervous, but when on stage she did awesome. Spoke loudly and clearly and is a dust bunny. I am so excited to see them perform. Last year Paige was extended an offer to go to a performing camp put on by the company, we will definitely be sending her.

Tonight at practice, the director kept saying "everyone needs to be louder..except Paige" or "see Paige's expressions/gestures..do that" or "why can't you do it like Paige" she said it was hilarious. She did say he also made fun of her for the way she got up (still nursing that hurt tailbone from snowboarding) so he would say "don't fall or you will break your butt like Paige"

Seeing the girls go through the process of auditions, rehearsals, dress rehearsals, and performance in a short week is such an amazing experience. I look forward to seeing the end result on Saturday. :)

Funny things

Just a few funny comments from the kids in the last weeks I don't want to forget.


-Paige:"Mom, how do you get your eyeliner to look like that?" Kain:"Black Magic Marker"

-Carter: "Mom, do you have a lighter?" Me: "Why do you need a lighter?" Carter:"pause....I cant hear you. "

-Paige:"Mom, your hair looks great today." Brandi: "yes, nice effort"

-Mia asked me last week-"Mom was I there when Kobe was born? I said, "yes you were, but you were too small to remember". She said, "It doesn't matter, I was there and his birthday is our friend anniversary"

Book Club

10 years of books. 1o years of meeting once a month. 10 years of laughter. 10 years of secret pals. 10 years of support. It is amazing the way our lives have changed in that time...but certain things remain the same-Our friendship, our love of books, and fun.

I cant list all the moments, or even close to all the laughable moments, but I will mention a few that I won't forget.

-The first annual book club Olympics
-Coughing up Diet Coke all over Jillys bed
-The MoonCrest Lodge
-Orange Slushie
-Murder Mystery Night
-Pinkie Blankets
-Cherie telling us she swore she had "special powers"
-Heidi jump roping in Roberts
-Musical Chairs
-Mashequa
-"holding the pose"
-Trying to scare Darci and Jilly
-reading book jackets and adding blah blah blah
-Scrapbooking
-Lying to Dana for a full year..that was hard..whew (secret pal)

I am a lucky girl :)

This is how we roll ;)

I REALLY don't know what it is about the Baxter children and the dreaded Christmas Photo. I usually make them dress up in semi matching outfits and try to get this perfect picture of the kids where all four of them look well...perfect.
This year call it insanity, call it laziness, call it reality check..we did our pictures in sweatshirts, and winter hats. Some inside, some outside and made the coolest collage photo.

This is just two of the pictures, there were others..This was probably my favorite picture of the card :) We ended up with a super fun picture that kinda summed up the wackiness my kids.

Saturday :)

We had a rare Saturday. No tournament..Carter had some basketball, but only because he manages 7th grade girls (can anyone say ulterior motives?..it rhymes with smirls) I ran errands, worked on my dining room table-I am refinishing it, made yummy soup and got ready for a super fun craft night. We made to most adorable Valentines packages. It was fun to have a night out with friends.

I sometimes forget how lucky I am. I get caught up in the day to day, and forget the blessings of small town living. It is easy. Friends are the same people you have known forever. Your "nights out" consist of sitting at the good old Heart Mountain Clubhouse with a super cool group of ladies.

I left with a bag full of awesome crafts and a heart full of contentment :)

resolution..smesolution

Ok..so I guess I am incapable of posting more than once a month. I have thought of it 900 times- things I needed to say, wanted to say, pictures, events..blah blah blah. The past month has been a tough one. It is probably better I didn't post during this time. The whole thing would have been a big giant complaint. Complaints about why parents can't see that their children mirror their behavior, complaints about bullying, complaints about administration, complaints..no one wants to read that much negativity. In fact, I emailed Megan and told her my February resolution was to stop posting on Facebook about all the drama ~ Happy thoughts only. The truth of the matter is, I cant change the situation. I can change how we as a family handle it.

I have countless emails unanswered, 50 phone calls to return, and a million projects to finish. I guess I have decided to put my big girl panties on, and get back into the swing of things instead of being completely occupied by this WHOLE situation.

Right now, this is on my fridge

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. ♥ So love the people who treat you right. ♥ Forget about the one's who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

Christmas

I have so many pictures and videos from Christmas. This one is my favorite. Christmas morning getting ready to head out to mom and dad's. :) The season was SO busy this year. Partly because we decided to put in new counters, paint all the cabinets, etc..it left little time to relax, but I am so pleased with the progress. I will post pictures of that soon! Back to Christmas...all the kids choir and Christmas programs were awesome. I love seeing them up there singing. It was fun because we have a great digital camera/high def video camera now and I got to record them all. We spent Christmas eve with Josh's parents and Gma B.We first opened presents here as a family and yes..the kids are spoiled! We went to church, had yummy food and then they opened some more gifts. We were all up much too late, but there was no way I was missing MUSH at my parents. I wait for it every year and Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without it. Dad read the story of the birth of Jesus (as always) from the bible and then they got to open more gifts. We left mom and dad's went to Baxter's for lunch and then back out to my parents for supper and super fun game night!! Whew, I am tired just writing it all down. It was an awesome Christmas and I loved every minute of it. I am blessed beyond measure.

Resolution

So, I have been such a slacker on my blog. I have two drafts that I started and NEVER finished. My new years resolution is to do a better job keeping up on stuff. I just told Jamie "I am so far behind I decided to make a fresh start and try harder from now on" If I would download the pictures off my camera more often it would help..Or maybe I will have a blog with no pictures. lol

This year I am doing my best to take better care of me..relax more, enjoy more, laugh more..and let some of the little things that I turn into big things..go.